Rude Kitchen Towels | Funny Snarky Kitchen Towels with Sayings | Inappropriate Tea Towels | GetBullish

Let’s be real: the kitchen is often where the chaos happens. It’s where the coffee is strong, the opinions are stronger, and the towel you use to clean up a spill should be just as unfiltered as you. Enter our Rude Kitchen Towels Collection — a gloriously inappropriate, delightfully snarky lineup of dish towels that speak fluent sarcasm and wipe up the patriarchy (and maybe some spilled wine). No fake positivity, no gendered nonsense — just sharp, funny, occasionally unhinged sayings that make doing the dishes slightly less soul-crushing.

Take the “Do One Thing Every Day That Scares Your Family” Kitchen Towel. It’s pink, it’s bold, and it’s an excellent reminder to remain the unpredictable one at family gatherings. Whether your version of “scaring your family” involves political opinions at brunch or showing up in a jumpsuit with opinions about late-stage capitalism, this towel supports your chaotic neutral lifestyle.

Or maybe your kitchen is more of a shared lair for mischief-makers — in which case the “You & I Are More Than Friends, We're Like a Really Small Gang” Dish Towel fits right in. It's the perfect nod to that one ride-or-die who understands why your freezer contains both vegan potstickers and a bottle of emergency prosecco. Plus, it's white and neutral-toned, which makes it all the more suspicious when it's yelling at you emotionally.

Of course, no collection is complete without a pun that makes you both groan and smile in the same breath. Enter the “You’ve Got So Mushroom In Your Heart” Funny Dish Cloth Towel — soft, embroidered, and ready to honor your deep affection for fungi-based wordplay and emotional avoidance. It’s the towel equivalent of a weird little love letter you pretend not to take seriously… but definitely do.

This collection features kitchen towels from our favorite purveyors of sass and sarcasm, including BlueQ, Primitives by Kathy, Bad Grandma Designs, Santa Barbara Design Studio, Slant, and Danica Studio. We’ve curated this mess of dish-drying rebellion so you can surround yourself with things that make you laugh and call out nonsense — even while making pasta.

At GetBullish, we’re all about smart, bold products for feminists and future-minded badasses. We don’t do "live, laugh, love." We do clever, unapologetic, and often a little rude — because being polite has never gotten the dishes done faster. Want to learn more about how we started and what we stand for? Check out our story here. In the meantime, dry your hands — and your tears — with something that understands you.

About GetBullish: We're a woman-owned company operating from our sunny warehouse in Brooklyn's Industry City. Since 2010, we've grown from a woman-powered career advice column into a curated gift shop specializing in snarky, irreverent products that make people laugh – and sometimes make them think. Check out our newest arrivals for fresh sass, or browse any of the categories in the menu above for inspiration.

From our signature sweary stickers and tees to our famous "bitter tears of mediocre men" keychains, we design and curate products that blend humor with a dash of rebellion. While we started with woman-power focused accessories (our mascot is a rainbow bull with a unicorn horn – a "bullicorn," naturally), we've expanded to include gifts for everyone who appreciates smart humor and wordplay. Shipping daily from Brooklyn with love and a heavy dose of attitude.